But Not On the Ice
by Lunarshade29
Summary: Get away from my goal! Yes, yes! Block that hoser!" Obligatory hockey fic on the Canada vs. USA game.


"McDonalds sponsors the Olympics! Whoo!" 

And yet, I own neither Hetalia, Olympics, McDonalds, or nations. So sad.

"Canada and USA, Brothers in Arms...But Not On the Ice"

**/////////////////**

"'It's like playing against your big brother'? Pfff little do they know I'm the older brother."

"They mean because I'm more known for hockey and it's on the soil now shut up so I can watch this game!" Mathew responded rapidly.

"...It hasn't started yet," Alfred mumbled.

"Yes, but I'm in the zone. And you aren't necessarily the older brother."

"My country is older."

"…"

"Okay...I'm still gonna win the biggest game in hockey history. No problem."

"...Get out."

"Wait, what?"

"GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!"

"..."

"Didn't you hear me?"

"Look, I don't have any other place to go."

"I don't care."

"I'm sorry! I didn't know you'd be so sensitive!"

"You said 'no problem' as if we mean nothing."

"Oh... Uh... I didn't mean that. Your guys will be tough. I just meant...uh..."

"Its fine I guess. Just... Don't be offended if I start badmouthing you during the game."

"Well them I have a right to do it back!"

"Yeah after the game starts."

"..."

"Maybe it was a bad idea to watch them together, eh?"

"We already said we were going to. So here we are. Sitting next to each other."

"...Hope it starts soon."

"Look, look! It is!"

"..."

"Damn it, they keep going towards my goal!"

"It's a fast game Al, you know that. Oh shit! Get away from my goal! Yes, yes! Block that hoser!"

"Whoo! Our goalie is awesome!" (he's from the Sabers which is in my state)

"Whatever, you missed."

"Yeah whatever."

"Goooo Go Go!"

"No! Fuck Crosby don't help him score!"

"YES! FUCKIN' EH!"

"UGH! Damn it. A POWER PLAY TOO?!"

"Hahaha! And you know how good we are when we score first."

"Shut up."

"..."

"Ha, we beat the power play!"

"Yeah but we aren't going to let you score!"

"..."

"Yes! Period over, we have one to your nothing!"

"Graaaa!"

**//////////////////**

"What is with all these damn power plays?!"

"Um... Your players are cheaters, eh?"

"NO. Oh ha, we get a power play now! USA!"

"Damn it."

"...Damn it."

"You didn't score either."

"Oh SHIT!"

"YES! Scored again!"

"Noooooo! Damn it Canada!"

"Yes?"

"Not you, your team!"

"Which is part of me."

"Graaaaaa!"

"Stop growling Alfred, you aren't a dog."

"...You sounded like Arthur all of a sudden. Oh yeah! Powerplay for us again!"

"It's only good if you actually SCORE."

"Shut up Matt."

"Gaaaa your guys are attacking my goalie!"

"Well they want to win! ....Damn, why do neither of us get these plays?"

"I don't freaking know."

"..."

"Wow Al, your guys miss some really good shots."

"...Wait... Is that...?"

"No, no!"

"YES! FUCK YEAH! USA! USA!"

"Graaaaa!"

"Look whose a dog now."

"...We're still winning."

"Thats awfully petty for a nice little Canad-- Damn it! The period is over!"

"Two to one! This is our game Alfred!"

* * *

"Fucking blue lines. Fucking puck. Fucking rules."

"Al?"

"Ugh."

"People always say I'M the competative one."

"You are. But fuck, they have to score in four minutes."

"Yeah, no."

"Yeah they will! Because they're heroes... Fuck Cosby and the breakaway!"

"Yes! Aw man."

"Oh shush, you're still winning."

"..."

"Oh god, an empty netter."

"Oh man, if we get that goal..."

"Fuck, that hardly ever-- OH MY GOD!"

"NO! That shouldn't've worked!"

"USA! USA! USA!"

"...Al shut up, my people are glaring at you."

"Who cares? IT'S OVER TIME!"

"Well, we'll win regardless!"

"We are going to be the 'national heroes'!"

**///////////////////**

"This is so fucking intense."

"Shut up Alfred."

"I mean, fuck, this is like SO intense and no one has scored yet."

"Shut UP Alfred."

"This is so—"

"Intense! I get it! Stop repeating yourself.

"Eh… damn it, my nails taste gross."

"Then stop biting them!"

"You're biting them too!"

"Oh… SHUT UP FOR A SECOND! LOOK LOOK!"

"Damnitdamnitdamnit!"

"YES YES YES! OH CANADA! OUR HOME AND NATIVE LAND!"

"I… I feel like roadkill. Like you ran over me."

"Uh… God, don't go in the corner Alfred… ALFRED! I didn't know there was a corner in here."

"Uwah! I'm okay, just a little… I dunno… my people are all a little down so you know. But uh, good game Canada."

"Thanks."

"I'm still renaming Canada Dry soda though."

"Well… that's better than threatening an invasion I guess."

* * *

A/N: Obligatory hockey drabble is a GO!

I wrote this during the game. So it's a little sporadic. But well… ahaha. I realize it's not grammatically correct and that's because that's how people talk. And the beginning with Canada… ahaha I don't think he'd actually ask America to leave. It was just a little moment I had xD

I was disappointed I suppose, but not really. It was an awesome game and I don't normally watch hockey. So if the terminology is off, please correct me. They are in there, watching their players, wanting to be in the game.

No, I can't take credit for the last two lines or the title, it was on the Hetalia live journal. AND NO HARD FEELINGS ON THE COMMENTS GUYZ! I'm American and I think they both did awesome. You CAN however, say your feelings on how this drabble is written because it is a little weird.


End file.
